EADS Comments on GAO Tanker Decision

EADS, still shocked over the GAO's unexpectedly scathing decision on the tanker contract award decision has decided to highlight that often things do not go as planned in the military.

"In fact," said EADS spokesperson Jon Batiste, "military decision making is often screwed up, so this condition should not be considered grounds for a contract rebid.

Mr. Batiste further mentioned that he believed that, "an American general of some importance once said, 'A bad contract decision executed now, is preferable to a good contract executed later.' Or something like that."

In related news, today the Air Force released its Agency Post Decision Brief where they make an argument for continuing with the contract regardless of the GAO decision:

In closing we quote that great scholar and patriot Bluto, "Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!"

So we respectfully say that the GAO should mind its own business. Civilian control of military procurement and Congressional oversight only go so far in our minds. We are going ahead with awarding the contract to the KC-30 team so get over it.

Boeing declined TAnchorman's offer to comment.

Name the Tanker Contest Winner

TAnchorman would like to announce that, in a bizarre twist of events, a dark horse write-in candidate has won the Name the Tanker Contest.

Throughout the contest two of the finalist, Scarebus and Euronator, looked as though they would make this a two party race by building a substantial lead on the competition.

But, over the weekend a furious grassroots write-in campaign was mounted in support of the name Le Misérable. A reader who identified himself only as V. Hugo was seemingly able to use his considerable LinkedIn contacts and Facebook friends to overwhelm the established party candidates.

The final tallies for the candidates were as follows: Scarebus received 11 votes, Euronator received 23 votes, and Le Miz received 136 votes.

For winning, Mr. Hugo will receive a full color poster of the KC-30. We apologize in advance for its condition as it was unfortunately, and totally accidentally, ripped a number of times by IAM union members visiting the Hill in support of the KC-767.

Name the Tanker Contest Finalists

TAnchorman is proud to present the official nose art for the KC-30, as seen on the right, and to announce the top 15 submissions to the name the KC-30 contest:

1) the FODzilla
2) the Scarebus
3) the Euronator
4) the DeGaull Bladder
5) the Tankosaurus
6) the Bloated Buzzard
7) the Bobbitt Boomer
8) the S Cargo
9) the Hauling Gasser (The G is silent)
10) the Jaeger
11) the French Tinkler
12) the Follies Breger
13) the Wankyan Tanka (Note: Wakinyan Tanka is the Native American Thunder Bird.
14) the Hunker Junker (Note: Junkers was a WWII German aircraft company)
15) the Flying Dutchcan (Note: Myth of a sea captain selling his soul to the devil. Also, EADS Hq is in the Netherlands)

From these submission we have chosen the below 7 finalists which we will now allow our readers to vote on to decide the name of the KC-30. The poll will close at noon on 16 June and the winner will be announced that evening.

KC-30 Tanker Naming Contest Update

TAnchorman would like to thank Tanker War Blog for allowing me to host and judge the KC-30 naming contest. It is a high honor and I take the responsibility to run a fair competition very seriously.

Remember the rules for the contest are simple:

1) Suggested names must be brief, no more than two short words. (No EADS you don't get extra credit of longer names or words that carry more vowels. So please stop having your Senator write us demanding changes to our RFP.)

2) Entrants are encouraged to include a brief explanation for their idea if needed.

3) Entries should be in the spirit of good humor. Keep it classy!

4) All entries must be received by 11:59 PM EST 31 May 2008.

Here are some noteworthy of the submissions received to date:

the DeGaull Bladder

the Corkerel (This is the French national bird also known as the Gallic Rooster)

the Scarebus

the Parisian Peacock

the Flying Subsidy

the FODzilla (FOD is Foreign Object Debris. The implication being it is big and will fall apart.)

the Tankosaurs

Best Tanker Ever (TAnchorman comments: This submission has been disqualified as it is too long and not believable enough)

the Petrosaurs (The Pterosaurs was a flying dinosaur)

the Mockingbird (Since we will surely be mocked for our stupidity in buying it)

the Bloated Emu (Flightless bird that has EU in the name)

the Flying Frog

the French Fly or French Fry

the Albatross

the Outsource

Keep the submissions coming........

EADS Tests New KC-30 MOG Procedures

TAnchorman has this exclusive video of a 1/16 model test of new Maximum-On-Ground (MOG) enhancement procedures to accommodate the larger KC-30.

Because the KC-30 will not fit at many existing airfields, EADS is testing the stacking technique shown in the video.

So far this procedure is only authorized for the KC-30 when empty, but an EADS spokesperson assures this reporter that, after they get some kinks worked out, it will also be authorized for fully loaded tankers.

The spokesperson went on to state, "See there is no MOG problem. This just shows you that at EADS we have the bold vision to try new things and not cling to old ways of doing business. Boeing engineers would have never have thought of this."